The Journey to a Christ-Centered Relationship
I don’t want anyone to start reading this article and think we have a perfect marriage because we don’t. It’s truly amazing, and other than my salvation, the greatest gift from the Lord has been my marriage relationship with Kath.
Overcoming a Broken Past
When I think of how broken I was in chapter 2 of our book, looking back at the kid growing up with his mom being married 9 times, two of the men twice, and the abuse from some of those men that hardened me for almost the 5 decades of my life. How could I have a normal marriage relationship? How could it ever thrive? I can tell you it took me getting to the end of myself to get there, as I thought the only way to make it was to be in control of all situations at all times, whatever it took, whether it be anger, manipulation, or even in some cases charm, my belief system had no trust in it, no relationship and for sure no kind of surrender as any of that would cause weakness and being weak was just not an option.
The Turning Point
Once I met Kathy, without a doubt, my heart softened a bit; when I say a bit, she was soft, fantastic, so beautiful, a church girl, and thought all these things would change me; they did for a few months, my old self came back and lasted for 27 years. Think about 27 years to finally get to the end of yourself and then fully surrender to something that was already there and free.
Embracing a Christ-Centered Relationship
Yes, on December 21, 2009, there was an experience through a song that started a journey that’s getting stronger even as I write this article almost 15 years later. That night, I told Kath that our lives would change forever and we needed to make serious changes like our lives depended on it. Well, they still depend on the same today. We, as a couple, have totally submitted our lives to the Lord, and our old lives have passed away, and we’ve become new creations in Christ.
The Power of a Christ-Centered Relationship
2 Corinthians 5:17 says: Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. (ESV) This is who Kath and I are as new creations, and we know this is an obedience that has no limits and no negotiations. This verse is even Kath’s life verse. God did this in both of us and redeemed us for such a time as this to share this story and others in our book “Sex on the First Date,” “A Story of a Broken Beginning to a Radically Transformed Marriage.”
Living Out a Christ-Centered Relationship
All we do is for the Lord, and the more Christ-centered we are as a couple, the more blessed we are in our marriage. This has also created a model for our family, not of perfection but more so of God’s redemption and what’s possible. We’ve given our lives to Him and whatever happens in our lives.To God be the glory!